If you disbelieve me, that is acceptable. Keep reading though and you will become better and more enlightened. First let me explain time travel exists, It exists in a form of energy. Bodies are not capable of time travel. But the sentient energy that encapsulates the body is, but enough of that topic it’s required to be discussed at another time point. To continue. A point has come in humanity where the betterment of the species has overtaken the multitude of hidden agendas perpetually enforced upon the masses. This came in the form of an outside influence to mankind that was all in one package amazing and devastating. Many attempts have been made to alter history, with alot of attempt resulting in a beneficial manner as to facilitate our arrival at this point, though it isn’t until now that we have the solution. Ironically enough it consists of you, Twitter, and open source media.
If you thought that Google Glass would be all about pretentious hipsters live-blogging their brunches, not so. Firefighter Patrick Jackson has been working to develop Google Glass apps that would give firefighters a HUD to see floor plans, estimated number of people inside, external conditions and any other relevant data that could make their jobs easier and more awesome and save lives. And it’s not just firefighters— think how something like this could greatly benefit surgeons, police officers, nurses, and other professions where the speed at which you get your information can save lives.
As if using flying robot drones to deliver your packages wasn’t crazy enough, Amazon’s next amazing, mind blowing trick of online retail will use fancy algorithms to predict items you’re going to buy in the near future before you know you’re going to buy them, having your future items already packaged and stocked at your closest Amazon warehouse, so that when you do inevitably click “buy”, your book or dildo or toilet paper or whatever ready to ship instantly. Magic.
Sending unmanned drones into the wilds of Afghanistan to shoot at terrorists is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the future of American autonomous dominance. This past week, the Department of Defense laid out a roadmap of the drone program, leading up to autonomous global drone missions and surveillance by 2022. Yup, in less than 10 years, American deathbots will be patrolling the globe by air, sea and land.
Upcoming USB Type-C connector won’t have right or wrong sides. And the angels sang, and lo it was a miracle.
Before you snobbishly push up your monocle and say “I’ve never had to flip over a USB cable because it was on the wrong side. Just look for the side with the USB symbol stamped in the plastic”, I’m saying a) you’re full of shit and b) this new USB connector changes everything.
Always thinking about the future and boobies, researchers at Microsoft have been working on a smart bra that would detect when the wearer is stressed out and likely to binge eat, and somehow preventing that unwanted action. Possibly by powerful electric shock or robotic voiced nagging, I don’t know, I got distracted by looking for a picture of boobs for the article header.
Delivering babies can be difficult sometimes, and doctors have invented bigger tongs and suction cups to extract difficult infants, but a car mechanic from Argentina has shown the world it can be easier, quicker and safer to just suck difficult babies out with something like a Dustbuster. Even the head of the World Health Organization has praised the ingenuity of Jorge Odon’s invention.
Taking one more giant leap towards legitimacy, Virgin Galactic announced last week that they will be accepting bitcoins as payment for a flight into outer space. Take a trip of the future with the currency of the future. Ahead of its first trips next year, Virgin Galactic has already had one “future astronaut” from Hawaii book a Bitcoin-funded ticket and hopes that its affluent clientele will follow suit.
According to recent estimates on the growth of robotics in the US military, by 2023, there will be about 10 robots for every one human soldier. Obviously this doesn’t mean that we’ll have an army of Terminators to do all the fighting while the boys stay at home drinking beer, but it means that when human soldiers do have to go into battle, there will be a small personal squadron of bots looking for landmines, laying down suppressive fire, peering around corners and over obstacles and distracting the enemy.
39 minutes. It may not seem like a lot, and obviously compared to the computer you’re reading this on, working for 39 minutes sounds kinda lousy. But in terms of quantum computing, it’s a big, big, big deal. That’s how long scientists were able to hold a qubit’s memory state for, which is way longer than anyone had previously been able to accomplish.
When cars were first invented at the beginning of the 20th century, no one would have been able to predict today’s sleek, smooth and fast automobiles with music players and flip down televisions and engineering that can push even the cheapest car to speeds those old horseless carriages couldn’t even begin to imagine. By the middle of the 21st century, gone will be the big, gas guzzling yachts, gone will even be cars you actually have to drive. By 2050, we’ll be zipping along in tiny personal pods that are autonomous, electric, smart and connected, so commuting to work will be less stress and more spreadsheets, movies and solitaire.
Apple has made literally a gazillion dollars in the last 10 years by making pretty, shiny products that force you to completely replace them when you want to upgrade and by making software only available through their walled garden system. And now, Renault wants to try the same shit in cars. The new Renault Zoe is only available through a rental contract (like a mobile phone), and if you need a new battery, you have to get one through the manufacturer of Renault’s choosing, and if you try any funny business, they’ll just brick your damn car remotely. Oh Google, please save us from this future with an open source car. For fuck’s sake, I can’t believe that’s actually going to be a phrase one day.