No one at Nintendo is saying that there’s ever going to be a Legend of Zelda movie, certainly not after the shitball that was the Super Mario Bros movie, But if for some reason, they did greenlight a Zelda movie, Nintendo’s Eiji Aonuma has a weird, very Nintendo-like gimmicky vision of what it would look like.
The legendary Hiroshi Yamauchi, the man who led Nintendo from a maker of playing cards to the world’s most recognizable video game console company over the course of 50 years, died today at the age of 85. Yamauchi was company president from 1949 to 2002. He engineered Nintendo’s global growth, including developing the early Family Computer consoles and Game Boy portables.
Like someone who’s completely given up hope, Nintendo yesterday put on their baggy sweatpants and unveiled the Nintendo 2DS handheld, something nobody asked for and nobody wants. The 2DS is kinda like the 3DS only it doesn’t have 3D but it plays 3DS games. And for those of you annoyed that your DS or 3DS screen didn’t get scratched ever, the 2DS also doesn’t close. It’s like the worst of all worlds handheld. Sure, Nintendo could have done a lot more useful and interesting and engaging things with their time and money, but they went with this.
It’s hard to believe that of the hundreds of Mario titles that have come out since the 1980s, Mario himself is almost always the only playable character. Luigi has had his moments and in offshoot titles like Mario Tennis or Golf or whatever-the-shit, you can play as Peach or Toad or Wario or Bowser, but as far as the main line of platformers themselves, it’s always Mario and sometimes Luigi. Finally in the upcoming Super Mario 3D World for Wii U, players will be able to play as Princess Peach for the first time since Super Mario Bros in 1988.
Today is Nintendo’s day to try and leave an impression on gamers and they’ve started out with the announcement that the popular Super Smash Bros will be coming to not just the Wii U this fall, but the 3DS. And with the new editions, there will be two new characters added to the fighting roster— the Villager from Animal Crossing and Megaman. OH FUCK YES MEGAMAN. Now if there was any other decent reason to buy a Wii U, I might consider it.