While Detroit is far from its glitzy days of the 1920s and 30s when it was the jewel of America’s industrial crown, but it’s not dead yet. It’s a city in transition, where old ruins come down and new things appear in its place. Things other than crackheads passed out on dirty mattresses in front of a liquor store. It’s lost half of its population in the past fifty years and a third of its buildings are abandoned, but in the ruins, people are realizing the value to be had with the dirt underneath— and they’re building farms and planting forests.
Julia Charlene Merfeld was caught on video, trying to arrange to have her husband murdered. The marriage wasn’t going well, she didn’t want to break his heart and she didn’t want to feel like she was letting her family down with a divorce, so she went looking for a hitman. That hitman turned out to be an undercover cop.
The governor of Michigan and the mayor of Detroit both agree it’s a last ditch effort, but with the city in decay and tens of billions of dollars in debt, the city is now under the control of an unelected emergency financial manager, whose decisions override any by the elected mayor or city council. Yes, in order for Detroit to survive at all, it’s now being run by a lawyer-czar. But it could be Detroit’s last hope.
When 11 year old cousins Eric Stamatin and Andrew Gainariu went fishing, it was supposed to be like any kid’s fishing trips, but instead of bringing home a big fish, the two boys ended up discovering a 13,000 year old mastodon bone. And mastodons are definitely cooler than pond fish.
From Michigan, the Florida of the north, a man in Holland Township was trying to cook a freshly caught squirrel for lunch when he accidentally burned down most of his apartment building. Here’s a pro tip: You need to kill the squirrel before you try and set it on fire, because those things are quick.
On December 5, 1970, Iggy (Pop) and the Stooges performed at Farmington High School in Farmington, Michigan. Luckily for us, in 2011, Jim Edwards (past lead singer of Detroit band The Rockets) posted a bunch of images captured at that show from a co-worker who was there.
Female legislators who dared say the word “vagina” during an abortion debate are blocked from speaking
Apparently, in the Michigan legislature, there’s a STFU rule, where if the Floor Leader doesn’t like what you’re saying, he can force you to shut the fuck up indefinitely. This happened to Representative Lisa Brown, who dared to use the dirty word “vagina” during a heated debate on an abortion bill. The Majority Floor Leader Jim Stamos moved to have both Brown and her colleague Barb Byrum silenced indefinitely because he didn’t like Brown saying “vagina”. VAGINA.
After raising the money and haggling with the city, it looks like Detroit will in fact be getting that giant statue of Robocop, now the only question is when.
In a sad, but equally heartwarming story, an unnamed serviceman from western Michigan was forced to pawn his Purple Heart to try and make ends meet. However, the pawn shop owner has said that the only person he’ll sell the medal to is the soldier who pawned it.
A 21-year-old Michigander fleeing a minor speeding ticket managed to outrun the police in a high speed chase, but not before stopping at Taco Bell. After cops tried to pull him over, he refused to stop, tried to duck into a Taco Bell drive-thru to get some getaway food before speeding off again. There’s always time for tacos.