I Heart Chaos

I’d decode those jeans.

Wrangler introduced moisturizing pants to keep your ass super soft

If there’s one things that modern jeans are missing, most people wouldn’t say “moisturizer”. But Wrangler has introduced the jeans from the future, called Denim Spa jeans that have three kinds of moisturizer on the inside to keep your legs and ass and… vayjay super soft.

They come in three softener variations: Aloe Vera, Olive Extract, and Smooth Legs (the cellulite-busting model, according to Wrangler). You can get the jeans in three different washes and three different styles, said Wrangler’s Marketing Director for Europe, Middle East and Africa, Adam Kakembo.

Via

posted 17 January, 2013
by cranberryzero
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And now, here’s those creepy Calvin Klein ads from the 1990s

Remember these? CK made these creepy basement porno ads in the 1990s, only to see them pulled, because they are fucking creepy.

posted 03 November, 2012
by cranberryzero
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Horsepants.

Scratch and sniff jeans? My jeans are already scratch and sniff, thank you

Jeans have been staples of fashion for a really long time for a good reason. They go with almost anything and they’re durable as hell. But wear the same pair for a week and they’re going to start to smell like ass. But if you had a pair of scratch and sniff jeans, you would release the fresh scent of raspberries with each crotch scratch. And the ladies love a crotch that smells like raspberries.

posted 30 January, 2012
by cranberryzero
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Leather and denim really is a stunning combo.

Oh, I am so getting a pair of JeanPants

They’re not jean shorts, nor are they pants. They’re JeanPants, boxer briefs cleverly disguised as really tight-fitting jean shorts with plenty of room to show off the wedding tackle god gave you.