I know it’s a tempting purchase, but remember that actually trying to dive into a giant pile of gold coins will cause all kinds of massive bodily trauma, possibly death. So don’t do that.
Being able to shit gold has been a dream of both kings and peasants for thousands of years, but scientists have discovered a bacteria that does just that. GOLD FOR EVERYBODY.
Gold and silver and platinum are relatively rare, which partially defines their value, but it’s sort of odd that they’re here at all. The thing about these metals is that they’re very attracted to iron, and if they formed with most of the other geology, when the Earth was born, they would have long since disappeared into the core.
If you want something really tacky looking, you can already get gold that has a tint to it, but it’s just tinted with some cheap, temporary process. If you really want to change the color of something permanently, you have to do so at the molecular level so that it reflects different wavelengths of visible light. And you have to do it with LASERS.