Disney is launching a Lion King cartoon series, but not based directly on the events of the 1994 movie, because that was sooooo long ago. Instead, the show will focus on Kion (above), the son of Simba and his punk tween ways and his animal friends, including a honey badger (who presumably don’t give a shit), a cheetah, a hippo and an egret. Disney describes the show as “Lion King meets the Avengers”… uh, okay. Does Simba’s kid have Hulkbuster armor or something?
I mean ultimately, in a perfect world, Indiana Jones would always be a young Harrison Ford and no one else ever, but that’s not how things work. Even though Star Wars has been their highest Lucasfilms priority, Disney also now owns the Indiana Jones franchise, so you knew sooner rather than later, they were going to start planning more Indiana Jones films. Even though Star Wars is a universe that can go on forever and Indiana Jones is pretty much Harrison Ford, as in the character is as inextricably linked to Harrison Ford and his style and personality. But, Disney’s going to do what they’re going to do regardless of what you or I say, so with that, apparently the internet rumors have Robert Pattinson pegged to play a “new” version of Indiana Jones. I’m not entirely sure how I feel about this— Twilight aside, Pattinson isn’t the worst actor in the world, but he was well cast to play a bland vampire, and while he wasn’t bad in Cosmopolis, and he certainly looks like someone who could play Indy, he doesn’t have even a fraction of a fraction of the on-screen spark and personality that Harrison Ford has. So Indiana Jones specifically? No. Could Disney expand the Indiana Jones universe to include perhaps a couple other swashbuckling archaeologists? Maybe, and in that world, Pattinson might work fine, as long as the character’s name isn’t actually “Indiana Jones”.
Now that Disney owns a good chunk of everyone’s childhood for the foreseeable future, it’s all just one big happy Disney-Pixar-Lucasfilm-Marvel family. So when Karen Gillan had to shave her head for the role of Neubla in Guardians of the Galaxy, that gorgeous hair just didn’t get swept down the drain— it was donated to the Star Wars VII props and costume department, where it will be turned into a wig, or a beard, or maybe even a long, luscious, fiery merkin for some alien race.