All Posts Tagged With: "Jesus"
Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter… the movie! [I Heart Movies]
In the future, vampires are no longer afraid of the light and the world looks like it can’t stop the plague of blood drinkers… that is until JESUS CHRIST returns to put the vampires in their place… with his boot! Thanks to Delsyd for the link.
8Nov2008 | cranberryzero | 0 comments | Continued
Drop Jesus a line, he’s online all the time [Pic]
So Jesus has this gigantic widescreen (but short) CRT monitor, a super huge keyboard and a 56k modem. And he looks like a complete dork. Yeah he’s cool. Plus with the dial-up connection, he probably sucks at answering prayers because his connection to AOL drops whenever God picks up the phone. Thanks to Delsyd for [...]
25Aug2008 | cranberryzero | 0 comments | Continued
Breakfast Discussion: Was the resurrection of Jesus a rip-off? [The More You Know]
After a recent discovery and translation of a 3 foot high tablet known as “Gabriel’s Resurrection”, the idea that at least the 3 days of death followed by Jesus’ rising from the grave may just be a borrowed story from earlier Jewish tales used to inspire and awe.
8Jul2008 | cranberryzero | 1 comment | Continued
Don’t mess with the Jesus at the Last Supper. He’ll use his magic against you. [Pic]
When you’re hanging with the Jesus at the Last Supper, don’t mess with him because he’ll cast lightning down on you. And he has like, unlimited mana.
30Jun2008 | cranberryzero | 0 comments | Continued
The Talking Jesus Doll is the perfect way for your kids to hate you forever [Stupid]
Say you really, really want to brainwash the shit out of your kid and you just don’t have enough hours in the day to accomplish your nefarious goal… what is a parent to do? Introduce them to the Talking Jesus Doll, which is like this generation’s Teddy Ruxpin of Smiting. Sit your little snowflake down [...]
18Jun2008 | cranberryzero | 0 comments | Continued
Monday news link dump: MySpace, Jesus and UFO’s. Sounds about right [News]
News items you may have missed over the weekend– Jesus in a tree, the inventor of the Pringle’s can dies, crazy teen girl MySpace sirens, transvestites at church, etc.
2Jun2008 | cranberryzero | 0 comments | Continued
Christ died for our…. mmm donuts [Pic]
The real secret to existence revealed… and why donuts seem to be a gift from God.
1Jun2008 | cranberryzero | 0 comments | Continued
Fortunately, Satan can be defeated easily with Tae Kwon Do [Pic]
Tae Kwon Do! Ha! God didn’t think of that did he? He was messing around and smiting when all it takes to defeat the Prince of Darkness apparently is a swift kick and a submission hold.
28Apr2008 | cranberryzero | 0 comments | Continued
Super Jesus-Patriotic Clip Art [Art]
With Super Tuesday coming up, you’ll need some super duper awesome retro Christian-American clip art to spice up your blog, your house, your Geocities page or your Super Tuesday church picnic fliers. There’s so much awesome here it makes my head hurt.
Click on the thumbnails for enlargerment:
Source: Crap Hound
28Jan2008 | cbz | 0 comments | Continued
Huckabee is Rapture Ready®, but is that what’s best for the country? [Politics Suck]
Of all the candidates running for president this year, Mike Huckabee is by far the most ready for the inevitable second coming of Jesus. Mitt Romney may be a devout Mormon, Obama may have done some great things in his community, but only Huckabee is actually born again. So when the Rapture happens, [...]
15Jan2008 | cranberryzero | 0 comments | Continued
Happy Boxing Day
Or at least civilized British Commonwealth countries have Boxing Day… not here in the US, we have to get straight back to work. Oh well, here’s Jesus on a motorcycle.
26Dec2007 | cranberryzero | 0 comments | Continued
Daily Links that will crush your balls if you’re not careful [Daily Links]
Cooking with semen: A cookbook no holiday gift list should be without [I Heart Food]
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