War is already nasty, but if this unlikely crap firing tank were ever manufactured, it would be even nastier. The design solves the problem of waste buildup inside a tank by converting the human waste into a weapon.
Aleksandr Georgievich Semenov’s patented idea solves the problem of waste buildup inside the tightly packed quarters of a tank, by loading the poop into artillery shells which can then be fired at the enemy. Semenov says that this serves a dual purpose. It gets rid of the foul waste, while also demoralizing the enemy. Personally, I expect that when you’re getting fired upon with artillery shells, a little stinky poop would actually be the least of your worries. It wouldn’t help, though — and waste getting in an open wound could cause a serious infection or worse.
Semenov was granted Russian patent #2399858, which comes with a hilarious drawing of how the system works. Apparently he believes that Russian tank commanders rumble around with their drawers dropped, pooping as they go, providing plenty of ammo for the tank’s crap cannon.
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