And it was all going so well until it went horribly wrong...

Looks like Jimmy Dean just lost a few customers. 600 pounds of men and a couple chubby girls to be exact. Watch this all the way through to the end-- that's about when I lost it.

If you're a lonely farmer, sites like OKCupid are probably a little too citified for you. Who has time to meet someone at a club when there's corn to be picked and shucked? The good news is that with Farmers Only, lonely farmers can meet each other for a little roll in the hay. I'm still waiting for a dating site just for homeless panhandlers. Via: Holy Taco

And it's not like he wants to come between Ashley and Lil' Wayne, he just wants to get paid every time they do the nasty. And since he's watched a couple kung fu movies, that makes him an expert in the martial arts, so Jerry Springer's onstage bouncers just need to step back and let him do his thang.

I don't care, I don't care, I do what I want! If I want to smoke crack and suck dick and punch cops in the face, I don't care, my momma can't stop me, the cops can't stop me! I don't care, I don't care, I do what I want!

In the deep south of America, brave men in NASCAR ball caps go wading through swollen, muddy rivers up to their necks in brown water to catch catfish with their bare hands. It looks like it could be a lot of fun, but it also looks like a bunch of rednecks standing around in murky water in a group, saying things like "yeah just slide your hand in there."

I don't know the entire story behind this other than apparently it's some super religious redneck woman who decided to keep her miscarriage since it was so precious and all that-- but you can pretty much extrapolate that much from the photos. And as sad and disturbing as it is, it's not unbelievable and not without precedent. The disturbing pics are below, so steel yourself. The shit's fucked up. The worst part for me is not that she would keep it temporarily-- I could understand that the mother would want to maybe see it and bond with it, but the photos of the kids holding it make me sad.