Ah, Christmas. The season to ruin perfectly good porn shoots with stupid Santa hats (SFW-ish no nudity)

The presents are under the tree, the eggnog is quickly disappearing… it’s the season of giving. And apparently it’s also the season for porn companies to completely ruin otherwise hot photoshoots by putting hot girls in stupid Santa hats.

Let’s start with a photo from Penthouse, that bastion of good taste among men’s magazines:

That could have been so incredibly smoking hot– great looking girls, good lighting, good angle on the boobs, blonde and brunette… and then the Santa hats completely ruin it.

Woooo! We’re three hot girls in a bar in really skimpy Santa two piece things! Wooo pass the Hennessey! OMG there’s something on my head that’s sucking out my brain!

It you start from the bottom of the page and scroll up, this picture is enough to steam your collar good… until you get to the hat. I need some more brandy.

How’d you like to open this under your tree? Eh? Get it? Know what I mean? Wink wink? Merry Christmas ugly fucking hat-makers of the world.

Okay, so this picture might have not been hot with the hat. Or the hideous elf vomit explosion earrings.

Heeey guys, we’re the hot Spice Twins… only we’re not really twins we just don’t like to go anywhere alone. We even like to dress up like Mario and Luigi together.

This is called a strip tease. That hat is the Grinch that stole my Christmas joy.

They seem to be under the impression that by touching their boobs together they can somehow negate the vortex of suck that’s created when 2 Santa hats are in the same picture.

It’s Jingle Time! hic!

Uh, even without the hideous Skank Claus hat, I ‘d hit it… with a tranquilizer gun.  And then run like hell.

This one actually isn’t that bad, even with the hat.   It’s probably because you can’t see the hat or because it matches or… I don’t know it’s just not quite that bad.

That’s it!  Happy Holidays!